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A Waiheke Island Myth Part 1 On Waiheke Island, New Zealand, a myth has grown up among a handful of people in the Rocky Bay Village th...

Thursday, 7 September 2017


[Recent News Item: The Waiheke Local Board decided not to support making Rocky Bay the official name of the village by having the New Zealand Geographic Board gazette it, giving as its reason a poll it ran on Facebook.]

Facebunk Rules! OK!

Oh goody! Progress! Stupendous progress! All de people-problems of the world is solved!

Yup! De Waiheke Local Board has shown duh way. Ev'ry democratic difficulty is now de thing of de
past. Yay! Triple yay!!!

The silly ole law wants community consultation, democracy and all dat stuff. But dat's a chore anna
bore and such a tedious waste uv time. Who needs it!?

Not us, not we de Waiheke Local Board. For we has duh new way. We has a wunnerful replacement for dat dumb consultation thingy.

Yes, we has. We jus' conduct a Facebunk poll. A Facebunk poll! Yes, den we knows for sure and sure
and sure what de community thinks and wishes its liddle heart for.

Doesn't matter two hoots dat enny bod on de planet, all de way out to Alpha Centauri, can use de
Facebunk poll, and dat dat's a tad or five past our bailiwick, and dat we can't check dem Liddle
Green Men 'gainst de local electoral roll.

We doesn't care about pesky details like dat. We jus' quote de Facebunk numbers and sign our
hieroglyphics on dem and it all looks all kosher. Yeah! Right!

Facebunk! Mush better than a bit uv silver on da palm of some ole gypsy in a tent. Yeah!

Democracy by Facebunk. Brilliant! Next we'll get Pallymunt to replace elections with Facebunk--and
it'll be Pollymunt! Yay! Duh Waiheke Local Board! Leading de way into de stun age!!! Hit 'em with
Facebunk. They'll never know the deference. Yeah!